Utah MTB

Archive for the ‘Jokes’ Category

Cindy Lu sings My Guy with her ‘friend’ for KWAR’s Aqua Idol!!! Complete with ring-toss, ‘Peter’ & Cindy Lu were a hit with the crowd and helped raise over $6,000 for Scholarships for Key West High School Seniors. Always a hit at Aqua, Cindy Lu is a favorite!!

Source: http://cindylucountry.com/2009/12/26/crazy-cindy-lu-video-hits-youtube/

Mark warns David that Twitter will only lead to certain death. David and Jack lose their lives to the Twitter craze.

Very cool awareness test. How many passes do the white team make? Concentrate!

Tell real breasts from fake ones by learning to spot the differences.

Performance, it’s the name of the game!

Bill Messick

(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

(9) Directions to your doctor’s office include “Take a left when you enter the trailer park.”

(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

(7) The only proctologist in the plan is “Gus” from Roto-Rooter.

(6) The only item listed under Preventive Care Coverage is “an apple a day.”

(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.

(4) “The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges,” is not a typographical error.

(3) The only expense covered 100% is “embalming.”

(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M’s on them.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU’VE JOINED OBAMACARE:

(1) You ask for Viagra and they give you a Popsicle stick and Duct Tape.

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acro-brat n. little kids who use their bikes like pogo sticks, with pegs coming out of the front axle. Should be confined to the circus or other freak show reviews.
air n. space between the tires and the ground. (Both tires must be off the ground or it isn’t “air”.) Said to be caught or gotten. See sky.
anchor n. your child, or children (anchors) that keep(s) you from riding. “Wait till you anchors grow up, you’ll have road rash for breakfast and prunes for dinner!” To be used as an endearing, not demeaning, phrase.
ano adj. frequently-misspelled abbreviation for “anodized”. See purple ano.
ATB n. All-Terrain Bike or Biking. A synonym for MTB.
auger v. to involuntarily take samples of the local geology, usually with one’s face, during a crash. See face plant. 
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